Every Thursday the women across the UK all have a dirty little secret. Well, it’s not actually a secret, and it’s probably not dirty, but it feels like we’re breaking the rules nonetheless.
So what is it that we’re doing?
Reading Shortlist – the free men's mag that is distributed throughout London and other cities in the UK every Thursday morning, much to the delight of most of the people bustling throughout this breezy, drizzly country.
Shortlist is a quality magazine. From gadgets to games to style and news, it’s a fun read. And that’s why women like to read it! From what I’ve seen, it’s not littered with half naked women and ridiculous “new sex ideas” or tricks on how to get your girlfriend to have anal sex with you. (Hello, Maxim. Hello, Men’s Health.)
Danny Wallace’s column is the first thing I read every Thursday, and every Thursday I’m the loon laughing to myself on the train because his columns are always funny. Always entertaining.
And now, in an attempt to smack down Grazia and Heat and all of those other cheap women’s fashion mags, Shortlist Media have created Stylist, you know, for the ladies.
As I very much like Shortlist, I was excited for Stylist. I like fashion and clothes, but I trusted that since this was Shortlist we were talking about, it would be quite meaty.
And then I saw the cover. A close-up of Angelina Jolie’s pouty mouth with the headline:
“Mum’s Home: A peek inside the heart-warming chaos of the Jolie-Pitt household”
Heart-warming chaos?
But, because I really want to like this magazine, I kept going. Despite the cover.
There’s a “Style List” of cool/pretty/expensive things. A nail varnish article next to the headline, “Why are women still earning less than men?”
Stephanie Phair from theOutNet.co.uk is featured with a “working day in the life of” style diary entry, which to be honest, was quite boring.
“Cycling in a pencil skirt is hard!”
“I used to work for Anna Wintour!”
I’m sure Phair is lovely, but the article was incredibly dull. Which probably isn’t her fault (a diary of my day would be boring indeed) but the dullness of the article was probably down to the very nature of the feature itself.
Stylist’s answer to Danny Wallace is Dawn Porter, and she's apparently going to dazzle us every week with a highly entertaining column.
Unfortunately, Dawn’s trip to Bravissimo article also bored me to tears. And I love Dawn. I really love Dawn. Maybe it’s because I’ve already written a similar story or just the fact that it’s a column about a bra, because we’re women, but I can’t help but roll my eyes and turn the page.
From features on skin creams to mascaras, to a “pep-talk” piece on why women are “born to be the boss”, I was just done.
Plus, where is the technology and gadgetry other than in an American Express advert, an ad for the LG BL40, and a 15 word blurb on the Samsung Genio Touch?
I guess what confuses me is that this is supposed to be the female answer to Shortlist.
And I stupidly thought if you have a successful formula for one publication, and decide to make a “girl version” of it, it has to carry on the same sort of feeling. Stylist does not feel like Shortlist for women. It feels like Grazia and Marie Claire’s free, bastard lovechild.
Stylist doesn’t have the same punch as Shortlist.
Where’s the edge? Where’s the fun?
Reading about Jennifer Aniston in another god damn RomCom and someone else’s biological clock isn’t exactly fun.
So why make a girl version of SHORTLIST if you’re not going to make it fun?
Or was that not the point? Were they aiming to make another fashion magazine for women, but for free?
There are plenty of ways they could have made Stylist more fun, despite it being fashion focused. Throw in some Vivienne Westwood. Give it some Luella quirkiness and even some fucking Peaches Geldof if it will spice it up. It’s not the sexy side of fashion they’ve chosen, they’ve chosen the Vera Wang, control top white cotton panties side of fashion to embrace.
It seems safe. It seems bland... like an pre-packaged M&S Christmas dinner. It’s posh. It tastes acceptable. But it’s got no soul.
Shortlist has soul. And a personality.
I’ll stick with that, thank you.