I know I’m not the first person to notice, and I’m sure I won’t be the last; it seems common knowledge now that Richard Hammond is slowly mutating into Laurence Llewelyn-Bowen.
The question is: why?
There’s no denying that Hammond has always been the best looking of the Top Gear triumvirate. Even after almost killing himself in an extraordinarily insane high speed record attempt, the Hamster kept his marvellous elfin charm.
Jez is too Daddish to have the same appeal, and May too obviously self-contained and contented. Also, you’d never get a look in while he’s trying to know everything in the entire world about everything, be it wine, space travel or heart-lung machines.
So why would a man who has already carved himself out a niche as the cutest car nerd on TV want to ruin it with middle-aged fop hair?
Nothing says ‘of a certain age’ more than layered long hair. Because there’s an obviously difference between these carefully coiffed and fluffed locks and the men who have obviously had long hair most of their lives and aren’t cutting it now just because it’s more salt than pepper. I briefly wondered if it was some sort of tribute to Farah Fawcett, but that doesn’t really explain the beads and leather necklaces that always seem to come as a job lot with the hair.
Of course a little bit of extra head-fluff won’t stop us having immense fondness for the nation’s favourite Morrisons-advertising car geek. But, Hamster, if you could just think of having a little trim to the back and sides, we’d all quite appreciate it.
Or you could carry on with your life not giving a shit about what anyone else thinks of your hair, which is probably quite reasonable.