This week Charlie Brooker devoted his column to bemoaning the breakdown of the very fabric of life all around us.

According to Brooker,

Our belief in everything has been shattered by a series of shock revelations that have shaken our core to its core. You can't move for toppling institutions. Television, the economy, the police, the House of Commons, and, most recently, the press ... all revealed to be jam-packed with liars and bastards and graspers and bullies and turds.

But I'm here to tell you, Charlie -- and everyone else who feels despair creeping up behind them with a riot police officer's truncheon, that there are certain institutions in which you will always be able to place your faith with confidence.

CHOCOLATE

No matter how bad the economy or the news, chocolate will always satisfy. There's a reason the cacao tree was given the name Theobroma, food of the gods. It's the simplest way to raise endorphins and soothe feelings of hopefulness or despair. You won't even care if you learn that it's pollinated by tiny midges instead of lovely bees or butterflies. Chocolate will never desert you.

ABBA

There's a reason that a film featuring non-singers singing remains a popular rental and a top seller long after its release. Mamma Mia! has ABBA. Lots of ABBA. You cannot hear ABBA and remain unhappy. You cannot hear ABBA and not need to dance. The Dickies' "Banana Splits" does the same for me, but it's got too much irony. You cannot trust in irony when you want to be happy. Just imagine the opening of "Dancing Queen"; you're already smiling.

CARY GRANT

Forget Bond: when you want to feel good about the world, pull out the DVDs and enjoy the careless ease of Grant's suave charm. Best bets, of course, include Bringing Up Baby, His Girl Friday and The Philadephia Story, but don't forget Holiday and My Favourite Wife, not as well known but every bit as spirit lifting. Okay, sure -- you might want to give Penny Serenade a miss, but there's also An Affair to Remember and The Bishop's Wife if you can't quite bring yourself to face the day.

BABY ANIMALS

You may want to kill them sometimes, you may have to eat them, but that doesn't mean you won't give in to the knee-jerk response when confronted by the giant-headed bundles of cuteness that fill sites like Cute Overload. There's a reason any zoo in trouble ramps up the pheromones to get those babies pumped out. Just look at Knut, the little polar bear who left the Berlin Zoo a lot richer than when he was first booted by his mom. We need cute.

INSECTS

Brooker ends his cri de coeur with the despairing call for some kind of new institutions, "Quickly, quickly. Before we start worshipping insects." But what's so bad about insects? They outnumber us, they're far more efficient, and let's face it, they're kind of cool. Bees have hair on their eyes. They’ve been around for about 400 million years. Giant Walking Sticks can be more than a foot long. Tropical spiders can spin webs nearly 20 feet across. They will rule us one day; why not get a head start on buttering them up?

For a start, you could share your chocolate.

Image via BBC Good Food